Light Out of Darkness
A co-worker shares how the futility of man’s philosophy, the horror of June 4, 1989, and the faithful witness of his mother and grandmother drive him to Christ.
I went to a college in northeast China right after the student movement on June 4, 1989, in which hundreds of innocent people were killed by Chinese military troops.
The June 4th massacre had such an impact on me that I no longer believed in Communism, though all those years I had been taught that was the only truth.
Many young students became very cynical since then. It was very hard to find someone to talk about the deep issues of life, for apparently in China a tyranny could take its citizen’s life quite easily, so why care?
In other words, it seemed people just didn’t matter in this insane world.
The first year in college I became fascinated by the philosophy of existentialism, for it simply described the emptiness and sickness of reality.
I couldn’t agree more with the philosophers such as Camus and Sartre about the hellish state of human existence, but somewhere in my heart, I kept asking if there was a way out because I couldn’t bear the deep despair.
I felt my heart was crying out, “Yes, I want to know that truth!”
In the spring of 1991, I met an American student, John, who was working with a covert Christian ministry on campus. I noticed he was always joyful and hopeful.
Later as we became friends, I got to know that was because of his faith in Jesus Christ. I told him both my grandmother and mom had been Christians for many years, and I even recalled my mom told me to ask God to help me in a time of need right before I left home for college.
I guess he was overjoyed by this news so he invited me to study the Bible with him. In the beginning I did have a lot of question about the Scripture, but then we got to the Book of John, in which Jesus said, “You will know the truth and the truth will set you free.”
I felt my heart was crying out, “Yes, I want to know that truth!” And later in the same book, Jesus proclaimed, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” I felt my heart was melting down at Jesus’ invitation to the Father.
On April 26, I accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior and Lord. I was celebrated into the college student fellowship which met secretly once a week. I began to grow in the body of Christ with some other Chinese believers who were led to Christ by other missionaries.
Looking back to that precious period of time, I know I was so blessed and prepared to spread the Good News to my fellow countrymen, as I am doing now.